how to use feminine energy to connect with a man

How to Use Feminine Energy to Connect With A Man

Knowing how to use feminine energy to connect with a man helps you create better, more authentic intimate relationship experiences in your life.

Have you ever suffered a breakup, knowing it was for the best but went back to him anyway hoping things would change? Or have you ever reached out to a guy that doesn’t even deserve your time and attention because you were lonely?

Or have you, in a weakened state, sent a text to a guy when your better judgment told you to wait for him to reach out? Do you ask guys out? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to know how to use feminine energy to connect with a man.

I totally get it. I, just like you, want love. I’ve had to reach deeply inward accessing my feminine power and take care of myself emotionally in order to avoid getting caught up in unhealthy relationships. And believe me, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to put this to practice. It’s helped me realize, unequivocally, that love is not outside of myself. And it’s definitely not found in me hoping and wishing for some guy’s attention and affections. It’s found by loving and honoring myself… especial my feminine side.

Find out how much you honor and love your feminine side

No matter how much we have liberated ourselves as women, men are still men and women are still women. You don’t need to be like a man to gain his affections. You need to be you, your authentic female self. That’s why, especially in this overly masculine world, it’s important to know how to use feminine energy to connect with a man.

Your authentic feminine energy will attract the man you want

Be the energy you want to attract. Be authentic and be YOU. The result will be you attracting a guy who is authentically interested in you. When this happens, it’s very nurturing to your feminine soul.

So how do you use your feminine energy to connect with a man in a way that gives you what you’re looking for and attract the man you want? You do it by connecting to your authentic feminine as opposed to your inauthentic feminine.

In other words, connect to the power of your feminine side and your authentic self. Not the person society has conditioned you to be. Your authentic feminine self I call this your Feminine Love Quotient. It’s the percent that you love yourself as a woman. And I even designed a Love Quiz for you to find out how much you love yourself as a woman. Because self-love is where your authentic power is.

Secondly, become aware of the dark side of the feminine operating within you. What you are doing to attract a man with your femininity that’s not so healthy. Pay attention to those types of interactions with men. Learn how to emotionally connect with a man instead of physically.

Notice Your Behavior When Connecting with A Man

To know how to use feminine energy to connect with a man, it’s important to become aware of your behavior with him. Is it sexual, emotional, authentic, physical, manipulative, agenda oriented etc. Is it coming from a place of fullness or not? Are you connecting to him because you’re lonely, wanting to feel attractive, or hoping he’ll pursue you? In other words, is he filling some type of hole in you that you should first fill within yourself? I see it often. Women connect with a man because of their insecurities.

Do you remember an old movie with Diane Keaton called “Looking for Mr. Goodbar”? It’s about a woman seeking love outside of herself.  She begins to go clubbing at night and picks up men for one-night-stands as a way of getting excitement and sexual fulfillment without commitment. It doesn’t end like the fairy tales we are programmed to believe. She ends up being murdered during her professed last hookup.

I’m not here to judge your sexual activity or choices of who you share your body with. What I would like to stress here, is the way women are wired. We are wired to manifest more pleasure but we are also wired with busy minds that keep us from pleasure. That’s why most women haven’t experienced their full pleasure potential. And that’s because women, women’s bodies, their sexuality, and sensual expression all thrive on being honored, revered and held as sacred.

If you don’t feel honored by a man, your Yoni (your female parts) will know it. Your head keeps trying tactics to get his attention but your Yoni knows different. The dark side of the feminine is when you’re disconnected from the wisdom of your Yoni and won’t listen to her. And when you’re disconnected from the wisdom of your Yoni you do things that aren’t in your highest good.

Are You Expressing Dark Feminine Energy?

The dark side of your feminine is expressed when you do things like…

  • Have unenjoyable sex for security.
  • Date a guy, not because you are truly interested in him, but rather because he provides other benefits; taking you on trips; buying you nice clothes; or taking you out to dinner and entertainment.
  • Relate through disempowering neediness. Doing things like staying in an abusive relationship because you don’t have the confidence to leave. Or being with a guy because you say to yourself, “he needs me.”
  • Be in a relationship where you are the only one in it. Your man benefits from all the wonderful things you do for the relationship but it goes barely or totally unreciprocated. You allow yourself to be in a relationship where it isn’t a partnership of caring and sharing. Possibly one of more duty and service or low-grade misery and frustration.

If you’re stuck in any of these patterns you’ll benefit by learning how to use your authentic feminine energy to connect with a man.

The Bright Side of Your Feminine

When you use your authentic feminine energy to connect with a man, you’ll get amazing results. It’s about knowing how to exude feminine energy in a new way.

The bright side of the feminine is:

  • Playful, transparent, and real.
  • Not overly concerned with what others think.
  • You understand outer beauty has a short shelf life.
  • And because of this, the foundation of your interactions with men come from your inner radiance.
  • You have an inner knowing and confidence that radiates your inner power. Which attracts to you all that you need.
  • You no longer need to “energetically dance around and put on a happy face” to feel accepted by men.
  • Stillness, sensuality, and self-nurturing are a big part of your life, always making sure you have enough time to take care of yourself emotionally.
  • You feel at home in your body and there’s no need to overly flaunt yourself in front of men. They’ll already be attracted to you by your authentic feminine radiance.

It’s awesome because the right kind of men will be attracted to you by the radiance you have cultivated within. Your energy will know how to attract men who are good for you. You’ll be the energy you want to attract; loving, nurturing, confident etc. Men will look up to you and feel lucky to spend time with you. A man loves to be in a radiant woman’s energy field.

The Key To Developing Your Authentic Feminine Radiance

Knowing how to use feminine energy to connect with a man is a matter of becoming receptive. Men are the “outies.” Women are the “innies.” Masculine energy is focused outward energy. And feminine energy is receptive and nurturing.

You develop your authentic feminine radiance by becoming receptive and nurturing to YOU. Really knowing how to take care of yourself emotionally. This is how to use feminine energy to connect with a man, by first caring for you.


  • Obsessing about a guy.
  • Trying to “get” a guy.
  • Asking guys out.

Let them come to you! Believe me, if they want you they will come to you. And those are the guys you want. The ones that are ready willing and able to participate in the relationship.

When you do this or stop doing the three previous things mentioned, your radiance will attract a man to you. And even from the other side of the country or world. Really! The man I married in my mid 40’s was a man who called me, out of the blue, from another state.

He was referred to me by someone who knew how passionate I was about yoga and holding couples workshops. He was looking for a place to hold a workshop. I ended up hosting the workshop. That was the beginning of our love journey. He came out of nowhere! All I had to do was be me!

All you have to do is take care of you. Get on with your life and what’s most important to you. Be true to you. Tend to your emotions. Be there for yourself when you’re emotionally upset. Do things for yourself that allows you to feel supported, nurtured and authentically loved. Loved for who you are, not for who someone wants you to be.

Right Guys Show Up and Wonderful Things Happen

when you know how to use your feminine energy
to connect with a man

Click here to find out how much you love your feminine side

When you know how to use your feminine energy to connect with a man you will feel confident and joyful in your interactions with him because you won’t care if he finds you interesting, attractive, intelligent or anything. You’ll connect with him on a human level instead of with some agenda in mind. And he’ll consciously or unconsciously know that.

If the guy isn’t authentic himself he will fall to the wayside. This is a wonderful way to protect yourself from attracting the wrong guy. If he is a guy worth being with he will stick around.

When you learn how to use your divine feminine energy to connect with a man the sex will be much deeper and profound. Your aura (energy field around you) will become larger. And you’ll attract even more wonderful things into your life. Your creative expression will also be ignited. And you may find yourself producing amazing creative projects. When you learn how to use the healthy aspects of your feminine energy to attract a man a whole new world will open up to you.

What can you do to express your authentic feminine today?

Did this article resonate with you? I would love to hear from you. What can you do to turn insights from this article into action right now?
Leave a comment below and let us know. Thousands of other women come here each week for inspiration and wisdom. Your comment may provide support to someone else.

Thank you so very much for being here and for adding your perspective. Please share this post with other women you love.

I’m Anna-Thea, an author and Divine Feminine educator. I support women in reclaiming their bodies and speaking authentically from their hearts. Women tell me, “I need to love myself more, I just don’t know how.” I have easy to use online courses that give you the tools you need to create more fulfilling relationships. In the courses, you’ll awaken your divine feminine and learn how to use feminine energy to connect with a man.



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  1. Grace

    This is an amazing article. I am just recognizing my femininity. I came of a long abusive relationship, where their was no room for me. I truly want to learn more, especially of how to love me more.

  2. Diane

    If you tell a guy you’re interested in him is that masculine energy? Especially if you’re the first one to say it

  3. Hi Diane! Good question! I would say it all depends on the energy around it. How did you say it? Were you energetically aggressive? Did you have expectations? Did you want something to happen? Or did you feel calm, soft and open when you said it?

  4. Hi Grace! Thanks for your comment. And thanks for what you shared. I totally get the idea of “no room for me.” So many people don’t feel acknowledged or important in their closest relationship and that is painful! Would love to support you in upping your self-love. Hope you have taken my Love Test that I created for women. If not here is the link It will show you what percent you love your feminine side! 🙂

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